Neighborhood Issue Revisions – Kathryn Boyd-Batstone

For my revision process I need to focus on explaining any scientific jargon I used and changing some of the language so it is not as one side.  Some parts of my story are not explained completely like why a headwater is important. I need to explain this better in layman’s terms and also cite my source for that opinion. In my initial edit, my personal opinion came through because of the language I used.  I need to identify those sections and changed them to more nonpartisan word choices.  I also want to make some of my sentences shorter and less complicated. I think I was trying to get too much information into a sentence when really shorter sentences are clearer.

 

About kathrynboydbatstone

I enjoy shooting nature, architecture, cityscapes, sports, and people. I like to take photos when I go camping or travel. I want to use my photography to make people realize that nature will not always be here for us to enjoy unless we take actions to preserve and conserve it. Photography is something I truly enjoy, and it makes me happy that I can use photography to make a difference. My dream job would be to photograph and write for National Geographic. I also have fun photographing people, and capturing genuine expressions that can capture an emotion or the person as a whole. Hope you enjoy my pictures. If you want to contact me, my email is: kathrynkbb@gmail.com
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One Response to Neighborhood Issue Revisions – Kathryn Boyd-Batstone

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